Busy

Hello there, it's been a while. I seem to have got really busy...I decided to do a few weekend trips before the surgery date (as I didn't know when I would get to travel next).  I visited a friend in Chch and the damage was gobsmacking down there...but we did find some nice cafes (not demolished) and had good chats. This weekend, I'm in Auckiwood - and have spent time with my niece and nephews plus the Auckiwood girls. I finished work on Friday - only to find out that I now have two surgeries.  The first one is a preparatory surgery - to prepare the veins in my stomach so they are ready to be moved. The op will take an hour and I'll be in hospital overnight. The second op is a week later on the 16th and involves the mastectomy and full reconstruction from tissue in the tummy area. That op will take around five hours and I'll be in hospital for 5-7 days. Work was full on and I am glad to have taken some days before to get some sleep and relaxation, which is hard to do when work is full on.
I know the second surgery will be quite painful so I am not looking forward to it but I guess it's good to get it over with. So June is going to be hard but then things hopefully will get a lot easier. By the end of June, I'll have the results from surgery - analysis on the grade/stage/type of cancer and what happens next. So the rest of the year is a bit of a question mark....we will see. It is a good reminder that we are not in charge of life, though I can take charge of a few things.
I had an art therapy session last week and it was great. I was trying to plan what to do post-cancer e.g jobs, holidays etc but really, I needed to just be with where I am at right now and I can plan the future later. The therapist also suggested that I write a thank you - farewell letter to my breast or something like that to mark this significant occasion - so I will do something like that this week.
My cousin Loma and I had pedicures and manicures together - I have blue toes and bright pink fingernails - and it has given me quite a lift! Treats are good :)
This time, I've struggled with telling people that I have BC. It is hard any time but I'm aware there are quite a few people that don't know. It is strange running a double life but in some ways easier for me than having to explain myself so many times.
This week and next are the big weeks - I have the pre-assessment on Wed, surgery on Thurs and then the following Thursday. Mum and I went to the plastic surgery ward and had a tour - so I feel more comfy about where I am going post-surgery.
I am grateful for all the support that I have received from friends and family. It has been wonderful.
:) s